Somedays, I am a failure. I went to the organic foods store here and bought a giant loaf of bread and muenster cheese. I ate 2 out of 7 pieces of that bread and probably 2 out of eight pieces of the cheese... the cheese alone is about 200 calories. I have no concept of what the bread is. I feel really stupid right now. I was hungry, so I thought I would just go downtown and get a fruit smoothie that I know is only apples, bananas, and a blueberry/pomegranate juice that adds up to about 300 calories. But with this little escapade of mine, this little stupid fucking meal, I probably am up to 1000 calories in it alone. I think the bread by itself was 750 calories or more. It was garlic/parmesan ciabatta (the ciabatta part is a guess).

So... my 111.2 is very likely gone down the drain with the rest of my day. What I'm worrying about now is tomorrow. What will tomorrow look like now that absolutely everyone I know is out of town? I will be bored out of my mind, which makes for a dangerous time of craving food. FUCK! What can I do about this?

I plan to watch some cirque du soleil online. I can write in this blog. Smoke out in the defying heat... play pool... loaf around and eventually get to sleep. I don't know what else to tell you other than, yikes. This doesn't look good.